Fifty Shades of Grey by E.L. James has become a bestseller and because of its popularity a movie will be released for Valentine’s Day.  The book’s popularity reveals our interest in sexuality but it falls far short of the true meaning of love.  I have not read the book, I have only skimmed the reviews online, but I think I have an idea of the emphasis of the book.  I fail to see how sadism and masochism represents love toward one another – the story seems to describe the sexual exploitation of  women.  This is definitely not my idea of a Valentine’s day date movie.  Can you imagine the discussion after the movie, “So what did you think of the bondage scene?” – that’s an awkward conversation (your first date might be your last date with that person).

We’ve become fascinated with the prurient aspects of our sexuality at the expense of true oneness.  Sex is not dirty and it’s not bad – God is the one who invented it!  One of the greatest treatises on sex is in the Bible –  the Song of Solomon.  We are created sexual beings; however, since the fall we have a tendency to settle for less than God’s best.  We were created for far more than the physical aspects of our sexuality.  The physical aspects of our sexuality are enjoyable, but there are feelings beyond words as you give yourself totally to the other person in a spiritual oneness and you experience what John Keats describes, “two hearts that beat as one.”

Don’t settle for less than God’s best.  Rather than simply settling for the physical aspects of sex as depicted in  Fifty Shades of Grey, read the Song of Solomon and understand sex as God meant it to be.  God’s design is that you  experience true oneness – emotionally, physically, and spiritually.   May you identify with Solomon’s words below,

I have found the one whom my soul loves . . . (Song of Solomon 3:4)

Associate Pastor – Discipleship.  The Church at LifePark

Professor of Discipleship, Columbia International University

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