A LEADER WITHOUT RELATIONSHIPS IS LIKE A LADDER WITHOUT SOMETHING TO LEAN UP AGAINST—

–NEITHER HAS THE SUPPORT THEY NEED, THEY’RE BOTH GOING NOWHERE, AND THEY’RE BOTH GOING TO FALL QUICKLY AND EASILY!

Leadership, at any level, brings the temptation and tendency to isolate ourselves, lest we be—

~hurt
~criticized
~disrespected
~”found out”

But a lack of any real relationships, both inside and outside the group/organization causes leaders to lack the support, accountability, encouragement, and growth they need.

In the end, the leader ends up making unwise decisions, bad choices, and having unhealthy attitudes that one day, sooner or later, WILL be found out…

–When they fail and fall– and the sin becomes PUBLIC

–> Then the hurt, criticism, and disrespect will be so much worse than what they were trying to avoid!

Don’t let this happen to you!

How we can avoid it:

  • Make sure our fear of God is stronger than our fear of man.  ~Prov. 29:25 tells us “the fear of man brings a snare”—it traps us.  It entangles us to the point where we’re so caught up in worrying about what others think or might think, that we’re afraid to reach out and be real with anyone. 
  • Join or create a support group where everyone in it participates wholeheartedly.  If one person refuses to share a weakness or struggle others won’t feel free to share either.  By nature, we always compare ourselves to the “best” person in the room—or at least the one who appears best. 

    ~True accountability can’t happen without vulnerability.

“Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed.”  James 5:16

~In order for this to happen, the whole group, including us, needs to be a safe place of grace for each other.  After all, who’s going to confess anything if others point fingers at them or look down on them for it?            

  • Submit—to God’s Word and the godly, wise, counsel of others.  It’s no use sharing about our struggles and needs for improvement if we don’t do anything to change!  True vulnerability entails a willingness to change and submit to the means of change set before us.  Otherwise, it’s just transparency—basically saying, “This is me—like it or lump it!”

~True vulnerability can’t happen without accountability—we’re here to sharpen each other, which requires getting close enough for it to happen and then allowing it to.

“As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another.” Prov. 27:17

  • Find and be a true friend to at least one other person, both within and outside of your sphere of influence. 

~While it’s good to join groups, we need real friendships, on an individual level.  The kind we talk easily and comfortably with, do fun things with, feel totally “at home” and accepted with, and yet who feel free to call us out on the hard stuff. 

An acquaintance can’t and won’t do all that.  Even the best group can’t do all these to the degree a true friend can. 

“One who has many companions soon comes to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.” – Prov. 18:24

Generally this will need to be someone(s) not directly “under” our leadership.  Although, in certain settings, where mutual respect is strong, such as a mate or partner, we can and should have such friends in our sphere of influence.

Ask ourselves these questions:  “Who am I fearing more, God or man?  Do I have a true support group?  Am I submitting in vulnerability or just being transparent? Who are my truly close friends?”

Don’t be a leader like a ladder in the air– ready to fall with the slightest “wind” of adversity or temptation!