“I have a question. If we accidentally, do it the wrong way the first time, should we continue doing it wrong the rest of the times?” This question was posed to me, the worship leader, by a team member during practice, after we hadn’t held the last word in a line for enough beats before going into the second line. The person asking had a good intention of consistency, thinking that it could confuse people if we held the last word in the first line only half the time as we did the last word in the other three lines.

But this logic contained two fallacies:  1) That we couldn’t go back and do the whole thing right—that is, sing all four lines of the bridge correctly, once we’d caught the mistake; and 2) That it was a good idea to keep doing something the wrong way for the sake of consistency.

I answered, “No, it’s better to do it right as soon as we catch it and are able to.” Then the thought came, which I expressed gently, with a friendly smile, “Would we want to keep doing something wrong in life once we knew it was wrong?”

“Good point!”, she responded, chuckling.

Yes, we mess up in life. Do we have to keep messing up the same way just because we did before? No!

Can you imagine driving somewhere, realizing you’d taken a wrong turn and were heading in the wrong direction, and saying, “Well, guess I have to keep going the wrong way for the sake of consistency”?

Yet, how many of us feel like we have to keep doing the wrong thing, or even the right thing but in the wrong way, at the wrong time, for the wrong reasons, just because we did it that way before? Here’s why:

• Pride—we can’t or won’t admit that anything is wrong with what or how we’ve been doing things.
• Fear—we know something was wrong with the what or how, but we’re afraid of what might happen if we try to correct it. The risk outweighs the benefit in our minds.
• Unbelief, aka “Fixed mindset”—we don’t think we can change or correct it, so why try.
• Foolishness—the “logic” and belief that we have to stay true to and consistent with our own and other people’s expectations of us, based on our past behavior.

How do we overcome all this so can start doing the right thing in the right way at the right time for the right reasons, right away?

1. Remember we’re not perfect, but that’s ok, no one is. If we’re still not sure of our lack of perfection, take a good long look at the Lord and His ways, then at ourselves in comparison. That will immediately change our perspective.

“In the year that King Uzziah died, I saw the Lord, high and exalted… ‘Holy, holy, holy is the Lord Almighty; the whole earth is full of his glory…’ ‘Woe to me!’ I cried. ‘I am ruined! For I am a man of unclean lips, and I live among a people of unclean lips, and my eyes have seen the King, the Lord Almighty.’” Is. 6: 1-5

2. Count the cost and risk of not changing against the cost and risk of changing. Guaranteed, the former will outweigh the latter. But if we’re still not convinced, envision and add in the benefits of changing vs. the benefits of continuing to do the wrong thing/the wrong way.

“But if the wicked returns from all of his sins that he has done and he keeps all of my statutes and he does justice and righteousness, he shall surely live; he shall not die! All of his transgressions that he committed will not be remembered against him. Through his righteousness that he has done he shall live.” Ezek. 18:21-22.

3. Develop a growth mindset—this means knowing and believing that we can change and grow. We’re not stuck with or in anything. Sure, we all have limitations, but that doesn’t mean we can’t become better than what we are now, especially when we get help. To develop a growth mindset, read proven research on neuroplasticity (our brain’s ability to learn and grow at any age), testimonies of change by others who were as bad or worse off than us, and Scripture that promises we can change if we let the Lord help us. Then ask Him and others for help and accountability, be ready to learn and change, and act on it.

“I can do all things through Christ Who strengthens me.” Phil. 4:13

4. Decide we don’t want or need to keep messing up for the sake of consistency. Change our self-talk. Ask ourselves, “How is this working for me?” Our past is meant to re-fine, not de-fine, us. We learn from it; we don’t give into it.

“Brothers, I do not consider that I have made it my own. But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.” Phil. 3:13-14

This fourth issue and overcoming it may be the hardest for us, because it comes disguised as good sense, and expectations are so powerful. For example, the person who has a history of being a troublemaker. It starts in childhood and continues until he goes to prison. When he gets out, he’s an “ex-con”, who may want to change. But the problem is, even though the “con” is “ex”, the “trouble” isn’t, in terms of how others perceive him and he perceives himself.

Or take the person who’s felt and shown a lot of insecurity in group settings. Once having shown it, they feel they have to keep speaking and acting that way, because that’s what others have already seen. “They won’t accept or believe anything different”, says the insecure person to themselves.

But what if they challenge that assumption that the enemy of our souls puts there? What if they say, “I don’t have to keep being/doing…it’s wrong! It’s not worth it! I’d rather…(right thing/way), regardless of what others think!”?

This applies to any of us at any time with anything that needs changing from wrong to right. Even if it means swimming upstream against the current of consistency and expectations. We can do it because we know it’s right, and therefore we have the Lord on our side, with the Holy Spirit empowering us to change. Fill in the blank—“I can start_____ (being brave, kind, gentle, polite, etc.) That’s why the Lord exhorts and encourages us—

“’Remember not the former things, nor consider the things of old. Behold, I am doing a new thing; now it springs forth, do you not perceive it? I will make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert.” Is. 43:18-19

Then start—now!